


It's not enough

by Alexei2020



Series: Oneshot collection [13]
Category: Iron Man (Movies), Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Cheating, M/M, Married Pepper Potts/Tony Stark, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Peter Parker is a Mess, Sad Peter Parker
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-01
Updated: 2020-10-01
Packaged: 2021-03-08 02:34:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 577
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26758087
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alexei2020/pseuds/Alexei2020
Summary: Based on this tumblr prompt from starker-promptsPeter thought he could handle being Tony's little secretHe was wrong
Relationships: Peter Parker/Tony Stark
Series: Oneshot collection [13]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1877071
Comments: 4
Kudos: 51





	It's not enough

Peter was panting, sweaty and teary eyed, crying out a muffled mantra of  _ yes, Tony, please  _ into the soft hotel pillow. It hurt, it was brutal, frantic and aggressive, and Peter loved every second of it.

It was merging the heaven of having a piece of the man he so desperately wanted everything of, with the hell of knowing the rest of the puzzle would forever be out of reach.

But Tony was his right now. Right now and every time they met in expensive hotel rooms, crashing into walls and mirrors and tables in a frantic battle against clothes and time and marriage vows.

It was all Peter would ever get, and he knew this. Tony never let him forget, the small, golden ring burning against Peter's hip in Tony's bruising grip.

Tony never let him forget, kissing his sweaty forehead as he got his clothes back on, whispering a quiet  _ thank you  _ as he left, Peter still a mess on the silky bed, sticky and filthy and aching.

Peter told himself, once, that he would take whatever Tony was willing to give, and cradle it close to his heart for as long as it was his to hold. And he repeated it to himself with every picture of Tony flashing in front of him on his phone, in the tabloids, on the news. Proudly holding his wife's hand, showing the world just how  _ happy _ he is.

Peter wanted to believe that a part of the loving smile he shared with his wife belonged to him. That he was the reason Tony felt whole. But when he curls against the dirty hotel sheets, smelling the faint trace of his cologne, cold and empty and  _ alone,  _ the creeping thought that  _ he doesn't really care _ is no longer a whisper he can ignore in favour of grunting and  _ fuck, you feel so good, Pete _ , it's a thunder in the back of his head, smothering every dream and fantasy of carrying his own golden ring, heavy and solid and grounding.

But he’d never have that. Never with him. And Peter  _ knew this.  _ It was one of the first things Tony told him when it all started.  _ I need you, Pete. But I need my wife, too. _ And Peter had nodded, smiled and traced the pink scars on his chest with a delicate finger.  _ I understand, Tony.  _ And he did understand. It didn’t matter if he couldn’t get it all. As long as he got  _ something. _

But something wasn’t enough anymore. Peter got greedy. He wanted more.  _ Needed  _ more. He didn’t want to freeze in the cold night air after feeling the man’s body so close, so warm, so intimate. He wanted a place in the man’s bed. Under his covers. In his strong and safe embrace. 

And maybe, if what he could have, was never going to be enough, then he shouldn’t have any of it. He doesn’t fit in the puzzle that is Tony Stark. There’s no room for him in his heart, and maybe Peter shouldn’t try to break away some of the other pieces to fit in. 

_ I can’t do this anymore, sorry. _

It hurts to turn him down. It’s something Peter never thought he would ever do. But he can’t keep shattering his own heart to squeeze himself into a place he doesn’t belong. He needs to pick himself up, glue his broken parts back together.

_ I need you, Pete. _

_ You don’t need me enough. _

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know what you think in the comments!
> 
> And, I'm on tumblr now! Come say hi!  
> https://www.tumblr.com/blog/view/kreket-popcorn-lover


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